What Is God's Will For Your Life? Lead Your Family

June 21st, 2023
by Joey Hufstedler

Good morning,

There are some people that get bent out of shape when you dare say that men are called, by God, to lead their family. The reality is that men are called, by God, to lead their family. It is true that women are loved equally by God. It is true that women have an equal inheritance from God. None of those things are the issue. God has given men and women different roles. This should not be something that causes us to be upset. This should be something that causes us to thank God for who He is and how He has ordered our lives.

Men, it is time to stand up. It is time to lead your family. God has given you that responsibility.

22Wives, be subject to your own husbands, as to the Lord. 23For the husband is the head of the wife, as Christ also is the head of the church, He Himself being the Savior of the body. 24But as the church is subject to Christ, so also the wives ought to be to their husbands in everything. 25Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself up for her,
New American Standard Bible: 1995 Update (La Habra, CA: The Lockman Foundation, 1995), Eph 5:22–25.

Now, I know that most people will focus on verses 22-24. Those verses are absolutely true. However, I hope that men will focus much more on verse 25. Verses 22-24 tell the wife how to respond to her husband. Verse 25 tells the husband how to lead his wife. The husband is to lead by loving his wife with a sacrificial love.

I can't tell you how many times that I have counseled married couples and heard the complaints from both of them. She will say, "he doesn't love me like God has called him to." He will say, "she doesn't submit the way God has called her to." I usually have a couple of thoughts when I hear these complaints. The 1st thought is that each spouse seems to be more worried about the other is/isn't doing in the relationship than what God has called them to do. The 2nd thought is that it seems that each spouse doesn't have a biblically grounded understanding of their role or their spouse's role.

This article is, of course, dealing with the husband.

You are to love your wife as Christ loved the church.

That is the example given. That is the standard that is set. FYI, Christ died for the church. The church wasn't worthy of the sacrifice but Christ sacrificed anyway. Thank God the Father that Christ the Son didn't make any of the excuses we make. Jesus would have been justified to say we didn't deserve His sacrifice, but He didn't. He loved us to the point of death when we weren't worthy of it. This is the example we are given. This is the standard that has been set. Stop focusing on what your wife does or doesn't do. Love her like Christ loved the church!

You are to love your children.

4Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord.
New American Standard Bible: 1995 Update (La Habra, CA: The Lockman Foundation, 1995), Eph 6:4.

Some of you are probably noticing that the verse says, “fathers.” There is no mention of moms. This is because, as Paul has already pointed out in chapter 5, that the man is supposed to be the leader in the home. Both parents are included in this verse, but fathers are held responsible because of the role they hold in the home.

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Did you know that over 40% of all children in America live in homes without fathers?

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Now, with that statistic in mind, let me give you some more.

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63% of youth suicides are from fatherless homes.

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90% of all homeless and runaway children are from fatherless homes.

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85% of all children that exhibit behavioral disorders come from fatherless homes.

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80% of rapists come from fatherless homes.

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71% of high school dropouts come from fatherless homes.

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85% of all youths sitting in prisons grew up in a fatherless home.

These statistics are over 10 years old. I can only imagine how much worse they are now. To single moms, God bless you. Your task is difficult, but not impossible. To the men, these statistics deal with physically absent fathers. However, what about homes where the father is physically present but is absent emotionally and spiritually? It is time to stand up. If you have been absent, in any way, from your child's life then it is time to fix that. Love your children. Love them by being involved in their lives. Love your children by disciplining them. Love your children by being an example of a Godly man.

Men, it all starts in the family. If your faith doesn't work at home, it doesn't work anywhere. The family is either like a sand dune or a sculpture. A sand dune has no shape or design to it. It just comes about by whatever environmental forces play upon it. It has no real foundation. Tomorrow's wind will change the shape and the look of the sand dune. But a sculpture has design. There is intention. There is a goal. There is a purpose.

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Your family will either be a sand dune swept and blown around by the winds of culture and circumstances, or your family will be a sculpture with design and purpose and goal to it. I think it all comes down to what kind of man you decide to be.

Serving Him,

Bro. Joey